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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28387992">underneath the tree (you’re all that i need)</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/capulets/pseuds/capulets'>capulets</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Outer Banks (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>A Lot More Fluffy Than Spicy But That’s OK Because It’s Christmas Fluff™️, Also A Bit Of A Dive Into The Non Rich Side Of Kiara’s Family In Addition To Some Kook Shenanigans™️, F/M, The Fake Engagement AU Nobody Asked For Because I Decided To Be Extra With The Fake Dating Trope, This Entire Thing Is Straight Up Idiots In Love That’s It That’s The Trope, We All Know I Can’t Do Tags I Apologize</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 14:35:32</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>15,740</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28387992</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/capulets/pseuds/capulets</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>kiara brings her fiancé to the carrera family christmas gathering.</p><p>or, alternatively, kiara and jj pretend to be engaged and deny, deny, deny.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>JJ &amp; Kiara (Outer Banks), JJ/Kiara (Outer Banks)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>77</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>underneath the tree (you’re all that i need)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><ul class="associations">
      <li>For <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/a92vm/gifts">a92vm</a>.</li>



    </ul><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>FIRST OF ALL, EVERYBODY SAY THANK YOU AND MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ALEX, FOR WHOM THIS FIC IS FOR AND THE REASON IT IS HERE TODAY! As for the fic itself, all I can say is I tried 💀 I read some Fake Marriage trope fics and fell down that rabbit hole, but I figured an engagement would work better in regards to the story! This is literally???? The longest one shot I’ve ever written???? So cheers to that! Finally have a tumblr so come scream with me over at dayas! It’s been so long since I’ve written for them so I apologize if anything is ooc 😭 also because of the season/nature of the fic everything is a bit more saccharine than usual 👀 The rating is for language, a couple suggestions, brief/minor mentions of abuse, but this is more fluffy and puffy than anything else! I tried to incorporate the domesticity with the trope and JJ and Kie. Shoutout if you catch all the references! Anyways, Alex, this is for you! I hope you like reading it as much as I loved writing it. As always, enjoy!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>This is a little too well known fact, but Kiara Carrera can sing. Her voice isn’t made to sell out stadiums or shows (though it could, if she wants to work for it) - it’s got a chill, laid back quality about it. She considers it fit for belting in her shower or jamming in her kitchen at three am when she wants a snack, but not yet primed for the double album she once dreamed about in her youth. She’s youthful enough at twenty one, but any lingering high school naivety is long gone. So Kie contents herself with singing Christmas songs underneath her breath as a steady stream of music videos rolls across the screen.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Pogue Christmas is winding down, and she’s seated next to JJ at The Chateau. He’s taken to the place since John B and Sarah left for college. It still needs a little work but Kiara helps out whenever she comes back. It looks pretty good right now, decked out in lights and cheesy decorations. On her first day back, Kiara hauled JJ by the arm off to the store against his lighthearted complaints that decorating was “too much fucking work for one night”. They had the debate every year, and every year they’d end up sprucing up The Chateau to Christmas music the night before the celebration and playfully going back and forth in between. It became </span>
  <em>
    <span>their </span>
  </em>
  <span>tradition after the rest of the Pogues split, and she’s been happy to keep it that way ever since. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kiara’s words shut off as she switches to humming, giving a final wave to Pope’s boyfriend, who’s headed out the door behind him. She’s banked on that relationship thriving since Pope’s first group call at college, when he relayed a semi starstruck story about a new friend who was a whiz with human anatomy. She sees JJ make a face at the pair, wiggling his eyebrows and whistling and she elbows him in the shoulder for it. His face turns to hers with his typical, ‘What?’ expression and she rolls her eyes, humming half interrupted by a tiny laugh and her usual murmur of “Dumbass”, this time merely on tune. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It’s always the two of them at the end of Pogue Christmas. Even when they started the tradition back in high school, Kiara was the last to leave. They’ve come a long way from ‘stolen’ food swiped at The Wreck and week old beers, and her grin widens at the thought. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Care to share the holiday cheer, Carrera?” JJ asks Kie returns the oh-so-innocent look from earlier, and continues humming. She’s content to stay here, in this moment, for as long as possible. She knows there’s no going back from it once it’s gone, and that’s because she knows this is (possibly) the stupidest plan she’s ever come up with. It’s a long shot, even for her, but in the spirit of Christmas miracles, Kiara decides to woman up and go for it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“JJ?” she asks, humming halted completely.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Mmmh?” JJ responds, preoccupied with balancing the plate of cookies on his lap, the lone frosted gingerbread man in his mouth, and trying to grab the remote on the table in front of him. Kiara’s nerves kick in as she stares straight ahead, fingers beginning to quiver. She tries to keep her voice light as she says, “Will you do something for me?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Mm. Wha’ ‘is it?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kiara takes a deep breath, forcing stability into her voice as she asks, </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Will you marry me?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The plate of cookies drops to the ground as JJ’s head whips back to face her, eyes wide.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What?” he coughs, spewing gingerbread bits everywhere. Kiara forces herself to turn to him, slowly and measuredly, before repeating, “Will you marry me?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>JJ stops moving, just staring at her, mouth slightly agape, like she just asked for the beating heart inside of his chest rather than a few stops after a proposal. She rushes to explain, words tumbling out of her mouth.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay, look. It wouldn’t be a </span>
  <em>
    <span>real </span>
  </em>
  <span>marriage, just for a few days. And actually, maybe marriage is too far, so what about a proposal? Is that cool? It’s just… my mom’s been on my ass about bringing a ‘serious’ date to our annual Christmas gathering because apparently my cousin’s wedding last year rattled her or something but I don’t know anybody else who’s available other than you so please do me a favor and pretend to be my fiancé for three days at my family’s function?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He doesn’t say anything at first, just sits quietly and fiddles with his rings, discarded cookies and remote all but forgotten. Just as Kiara’s about to scream or ramble some more, JJ exhales and says, “Yeah. Okay, yeah. I’ll do it. But you owe me big time for this, Kie — like my own Kook yacht big time. With a fancy statue of myself, a dozen bottles of champagne, two hot tu-” Kiara throws her arms around him in excitement, relief flooding through every square inch of her body. JJ returns her hug, murmuring in her ear, “If you’re gonna thank me like this, I’ll have to start doing you favors more often.” She pulls back and glares at him and he winks, so she detaches. Standing, Kie crosses her arms loosely. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay, we’re gonna need a story. I haven’t told my parents I’ve been seeing anyone show they’ll be shocked, but… what do you think?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It happened on the Pogue,” he says decisively, and though her eyebrows raise at the suddenness of the answer, Kiara keeps her mouth shut as he hesitantly continues, “Uh… I don’t know. We’ve been on and off for a few years but last summer we decided to try long distance while you were at school, and then you came back and I couldn’t wait so I took you out for dinner on the boat and popped the question there?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>In her mind, she could see it. The story makes sense; after years and years of telling people she and JJ weren’t together when they all thought otherwise, it shouldn’t be too much of a stretch. And with the actual proposal piece, it fits them perfectly. Both together, out on the water, enjoying each other’s company and ending the night with an early Christmas gift in the form of a life together. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah,” Kiara murmurs, coming out of her imaginative haze and clearing her throat, “Yeah, that’ll work.” JJ nods and she leaves it at that. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We’re gonna need a ring,” she says next, and he replies, “Got it covered.” Clouds rise up in his blue irises, and she gets the message loud and clear: </span>
  <em>
    <span>Don’t ask. </span>
  </em>
  <span>Instead of pursuing her curiosity, she sinks back down on the couch next to JJ.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She doesn’t say anything at first, grabbing a napkin and wiping off the crumbs still scattered along his face and the ugly Christmas sweater he’s wearing as part of a lost bet to John B. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Thank you,” Kiara murmurs, “for doing this. I know it’s sudden and I just kind of sprung it on you, but thank you, really. After the weekend’s over, I’ll just tell my family we broke the engagement off and realized we’re better as friends.” That would give her a year’s worth of cover from future functions, at least. Still, Kiara’s gratitude is extreme. After Pope and John B headed out of the OBX, she was the next to go. Her parents paid her tuition and she started studying oceanography on the mainland. Coming back to the OBX happens every few weeks to spend some time with her family and link up with JJ, but she’s never fully shaken the feeling that she </span>
  <em>
    <span>left</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Left him here, alone. Again. And yet, every time she comes back, it’s like she never went. It can be ten minutes or ten years; JJ and Kiara will always fall back into each other.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You can thank me when I’m driving a Grady White through the marsh,” JJ tells her, swiping the napkin and tossing it on the plate near them. His expression softens for half a second as he adds, “Always, Kie.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She holds his gaze for a beat before snapping her head back to the television, and JJ turns the channel to old Christmas reruns. It’s a familiar scene; she can’t count the times she’s visited in the past few years and they’ve ended up just like this. Kie settles her head onto JJ’s shoulder, offering a quick smile and the words, “Gotta start practicing,” as her only explanation. He smirks in return, wrapping an arm around her shoulders and replying, “Sure, Kie. Whatever you say.”</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>This just might work, </span>
  </em>
  <span>Kiara thinks as she focuses on the movie. All that’s left to do is put the plan in motion. A tune strikes up on the television and this time, Kiara sings along. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>***</span>
</p><p>
  <span>As it turns out, putting the plan in motion for JJ Maybank means going to see his dad. All roads lead to Luke, and despite doing his best to stay as far away from that man as possible after high school, he always ends up coming back home. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Like most things in his life, it sort of just happens. He heads back to the house after work, antsy and determined. An old shipyard hired him right out of high school, so he spends most of his time fixing up dinghies and kook yachts. It’s a decent living, enough to keep the lights on and the water running at The Chateau, and that’s all he needs. Of course, seeing Kiara every couple of weekends doesn’t hurt either. It’s something she came up with while taking a gap year after John B and Pope took off. They’d sat at the docks, beers in hand, and she’d said, “</span>
  <em>
    <span>I’m gonna come back here, you know. I’ll be on the Mainland, just a ferry ride away.” </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>He didn’t need to see her lips move to catch the subtext: </span>
  <em>
    <span>I’m not gonna leave you. Again.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>And she didn’t. They lived their lives and traded memes and jokes, occasional phone calls. He ignored the tug in his chest when she leaped into his arms whenever she got back. He didn’t acknowledge how bright he smiled when she called him a dumbass or an idiot and told him to shove over whenever they spent an hour or two fixing up whatever was broken at The Chateau. He fucked around when she left, and she did too. And now he was about to pretend to be the love of her life for three days so her family would get off her back. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Brilliant fucking plan, JJ. You’ve outdone yourself on this one. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>The technicalities don’t matter to him; he agreed to it, which means he’s gotta go through with it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>(And in his heart of hearts, not that he’d ever admit to it, he knows she could’ve asked him to wife her up for real and he would’ve found a courthouse within the hour.)</span>
</p><p>
  <span>JJ’s hands shake on the steering wheel of his truck as he pulls into the driveway. There’s a fifty percent chance of his dad being home, and he’s slightly relieved to find he’s finally lucked out in that regard once he walks through the door. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He heads straight for his room, shutting his door before reaching for a box in the back of his closet. After rifling through it for a few minutes, he pulls out what he was looking for. It’s a ring, a simple gold band with three tiny diamonds on each side that almost form a wave. A slightly larger diamond shines in the middle, set into the shape of an oval. JJ doesn’t know much about rings or jewelry in general, but this was his mom’s and that’s good enough for him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He returns the box to its hiding place and heads out of his room. The front door creaks the moment his foot steps out. The Maybank luck is working like a charm today.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Fuck. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Slipping the ring into his back pocket, he walks to the front door to find his father drunkenly stumbling through it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What’re you doin’ here, boy?” Luke slurs, and JJ looks down, mumbling, “Nothin’.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He’s twenty one years old and he feels like a sixteen year old kid because of this man. And he hates it, he hates the fact that he’s still here, the fact that a tiny little part of him wanted to make sure his dad was still alive. Luke glares at JJ and the younger Maybank braces himself for confrontation on instinct. It doesn’t come. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>JJ doesn’t question it. In fact, he doesn’t give a fuck if its God or Buddha or some kind of Christmas miracle from Santa Claus himself. The second Luke sways past, JJ’s out the door, shutting it behind him and starting his car. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fingers twitching on the wheel, he heads over to Kiara’s immediately. She’s waiting at the door, but the smile she wears wipes right off her face as she approaches.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What’s up?” she asks, and he shakes his head. As nonchalantly as possible, he tells her, “Just saw my dad. At the house.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And technically this falls into the </span>
  <em>
    <span>Don’t Ask </span>
  </em>
  <span>category but he knows the look in her eyes and it’s the same one that tells him she can’t help herself as she says, “What happened?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“For once? Nothing. But it doesn’t matter — I just went to pick up this.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Out comes the ring from his back pocket and Kiara’s face goes soft in recognition. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I can’t wear that,” she whispers, eyes flickering up to his. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s just a ring, Kie. No big deal,” he shrugs. And really, it isn’t. It’s one of the things his mom left for him before she skipped town. Everything in that box is something of hers she wanted him to have. He never understood why the ring was included, but it starts to click as he imagines it on Kiara’s finger. Based off of Kiara’s expression, though, she’s firmly set into refusing. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“JJ,” she starts to argue, so he rolls his eyes and takes her left hand, slipping the ring on. It sits there like it was made for her, and the larger part of his brain tells him they’re pretty damn lucky they won’t have to get it resized. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>(The smaller, more fucked up part is wondering if he can ever watch someone else wear it because he’s pretty sure nobody is gonna come close to how good it looks on her.) </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Perfect fit,” he notes, staring down at it alongside her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah,” she echoes, eyes locked onto the ring. The sound of an approaching vehicle snaps both of them out of their haze, and Kie curses.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s my mom and dad. I thought they wouldn’t be back till later but apparently Christmas shopping ended early.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>JJ doesn’t panic. He’s bullshit his way out of far more difficult situations before. And yet, this one feels completely separate from all of them. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Let’s test this out, then,” he finds himself saying, taking her left hand in his. She offers him a grateful look before her mother comes rushing up and envelops her in a hug. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hello, Miss Anna,” JJ says, stepping away and giving the pair their space. He knows how her parents feel about them, which is why he makes a mental note to have Pope on the phone at the ready after they drop this fake bomb. They might need a doctor for a couple of cardiac arrests.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Mom, JJ and I have something to tell you…” Kiara begins and Anna blurts out, “Please, God, don’t tell me you’re pregnant.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What?” Kiara screeches, backing up a few steps, “No! Of course I’m not pregnant — why the hell would you think I’m pregnant?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Anna merely shoots them an unimpressed look, and JJ swallows.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Maybe it would be better to show you,” he smooths over easily. Kiara’s eyes are on him when his gaze finds her, and she nods at him. He reclaims her hand as she returns those few steps, leaning into his side. Together, they put her hand in full view of Anna, and now Mike as he reaches them out in front of the house.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Surprise,” Kiara whispers, cracking a weak smile. Anna looks down at the ring, up at her daughter and JJ, back down, and back up again. Mike’s eyes never leave their faces. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Mom. Dad. Say something.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Her hand begins to shake, so he squeezes it on instinct. He understands why she’d be nervous, after all. If they can’t sell this to her parents, then how the hell are they going to convince the rest of her family? Luckily, that’s a question he doesn’t need to answer. Tears fall down Anna’s face as she leans forward and embraces her daughter. A shocked Kiara hugs her back, and JJ watches her lay her face down as her shoulders shake a bit.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You didn’t ask for my blessing,” Mike says, and JJ responds without missing a beat, “It was spontaneous. But I was going to, Mr. Carrera.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I will kill you if you hurt my daughter,” is all he says, and suddenly JJ’s in an embrace of his own. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“When did this happen?” Anna asks through her happy tears, and Kie reclaims JJ’s hand once he’s done with his hug, re-settling herself by his side to reply, “Last night. JJ took me out on the Pogue after everybody else left and he asked me then. I know it probably seems super sudden, but we decided to try dating in the summer. Plus we’ve known each other forever anyways, so…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Not that sudden,” Mike coughs underneath his breath, narrowed eyes offset by the happiness inside them. JJ wraps an arm around Kiara on a whim, pressing a kiss against her head. He knows he isn’t close to fiancé or even boyfriend material, but he’s picked up a few tricks from all the shitty rom coms Sarah’s forced them all to watch over the years. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m just glad she said yes.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Lucky I said yes, you mean. I could still change my mind.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kiara grins up at him, and JJ thinks she should move to Hollywood and become an actress. Best Outstanding Performance for pretending to be his giddy fiancee staring at him like he climbed to space and got her the moon or some other cliche shit future husbands think of doing. Anna and Mike laugh, and JJ swears he’s in some fucked up version of the Twilight Zone because </span>
  <em>
    <span>no way </span>
  </em>
  <span>do her parents magically like him more because he’s decided to get engaged to their daughter. </span>
</p><p>
  <b>
    <em>Fake </em>
  </b>
  <em>
    <span>engaged. Fake engagement. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>The Carreras insist on him staying for dinner so he obliges. And to be honest… it goes a lot better than some of their previous encounters. Mike’s still on the edge about their impromptu decision, but he talks to JJ like he’s his future son-in-law instead of his daughter’s best friend from the wrong side of the tracks. Anna doesn’t approve entirely either, but he figures she’s so happy to see Kiara in a relationship that she can show off to the rest of her family that she isn’t even too appalled it’s with JJ. They manage to make it through dinner well enough, fielding questions about their relationship and its nuances like old pros. They go back and forth like they always do, still the same team, just with a new mission. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>At the end of the night, JJ stands at the front door with Kiara, holding her hand and ignoring the stares of her parents to the best of his ability. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I can’t believe we just did that,” she mutters. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Rest of your family should be a piece of cake, then,” he smirks back.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She shoots him a playfully withering glance, and he grins.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“C’mon, Kie. Relax. Your mom and dad think we’re legit, and theoretically or statistically or whatever, they’re probably, like, the hardest to convince.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Two down, thirty more to go.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He chuckles confidently before his eyes go over her head. His lips barely move as he whispers the words, “Your parents are still watching.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Night, babe,” Kiara says, her volume carrying through to the kitchen as recognition lights in her eyes, “I’ll see you tomorrow.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>JJ takes his cue, leaning down and pressing his lips against hers. Kiara kisses him back sweetly, and he pulls back slow, almost reluctantly. He’s gotta be committed if they want to keep their act alive.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Night,” he mumbles against her lips. He forces himself to pull back, sparing one last glance of his mother’s ring on Kiara’s hand. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>If their entire weekend is going to be like that, JJ figures this fake engagement thing might not be so bad.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>***</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Caroline Maybank’s ring glitters in the sunlit spaces through the falling snow, and it’s about right now that Kiara doesn’t know if she can do this. It’s been a whirlwind of a few days, perfecting their act and packing up, traveling with her parents to the enormous lodge her grandparents use to host their family for the holidays every year. JJ’s standing by her side, fingers wound together. Their eyes flicker down to the shiny band, and Kie squeezes JJ’s hands. His fingers still. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We got this, right?” she asks, and he nods.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“For sure. One hundred percent. It’s gonna be a walk in the park — or a backflip off a yacht.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The cheeky grin edging onto his lips is met with her nudging her shoulder into his side.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Do your job first,” Kie warns him as her parents stroll past them to embrace her grandparents, who are waiting at the door, “Showtime.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Squaring her shoulders, she steps forward with him, smiling lightly as her mom and dad move away from her mother’s parents. Truthfully, she’s closer with her grandmother on her father’s side, but she’s taking every familial interaction as it comes at her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Kiara!” Her grandmother enthuses, “My, look how you’ve grown! Oh, you’re becoming such a beautiful young lady — oh, who’s this?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Her grandfather, ever silent, watches on as Kiara inhales quickly, forcing her smile to widen as she says, “This is JJ Maybank. My fiancé.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s a pleasure to meet you, ma’am,” JJ says, and Kie’s grandmother merely blinks at them. It’s her grandfather who steps forward, offering his hand, which JJ takes. Kie lets out a breath she hadn’t known she was holding as the two start to chat, and she’s whisked into the house by her grandmother.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Isn’t that that boy from The Cut?” Her grandmother grimaces once they’re out of earshot, “He’s so unrefined! Kiara, my darling, you can do so much better for yourself.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Laughing children sprint down the hallway they stand in, and anger sparks in Kiara’s eyes. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Good God, Clarisse. Let the girl be happy for once. She’s </span>
  <em>
    <span>engaged, </span>
  </em>
  <span>for Christ’s sake. Who cares about who it’s to?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Her grandmother from her father’s side, Lily Carrera, appears, and beams as she folds Kiara into her arms. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>As part of their Christmas tradition, both the Carreras and her mother’s side of the family all spend the holiday together. She knows her dad’s side looks forward to it every year, despite the more opulent family members on her mother’s side looking down upon them. Truthfully, her dad’s side is a big part of Kiara’s tolerance of Christmas. Unlike the ‘higher ups’ on her mom’s side, they’re not bragging about who’s vacation was more epic, how expensive and rare their gifts are, or any other capitalist bullshit they love to spout because of the corporate greed surrounding Christmas. Her dad’s side of the family is simply happy to be there and together, and that’s why she holds more love in her heart for the holiday than she normally would for such a blatantly corporate venture. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m happy for you, honey,” Lily murmurs, “And I can’t wait to meet this boy. You two have started on giving me some grandchildren, right?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lily cackles while Clarisse looks scandalized, and Kiara snorts, shaking her head.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“One thing at a time, Grandma Lily,” she manages, pressing a frigid hand to cool her semi warmed cheek. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What are you ladies up to?” Clarisse’s husband asks as he joins them. Kiara’s eyebrows come together but her question is answered before she can ask it. “Your fiancé’s helping Mike get everyone’s things to their rooms and settling in. I told him that the help could handle it, but he and your young man insisted. Hard workers, the both of them.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It’s a similarity Kiara’s never considered before, so she files it away in the back of her mind.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Guess I’d better go help too, then,” she shrugs, and Clarisse frowns, calling after her, “That’s not what ladies do and you </span>
  <em>
    <span>know that, </span>
  </em>
  <span>Kiara!” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lily smiles and waves at her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She works her way through the enormous house, waving at all of her relatives from both sides. They haven’t converged on her yet, which means they are unaware of her changing marital status. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Semi changing. </span>
  </em>
  <b>
    <em>Fake </em>
  </b>
  <em>
    <span>changing.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Either way, she’s relieved to make it to her room and shut the door. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The room itself is quite large, a boudoir and mirror near the door. Large windows covered in gossamer curtains feed into the pale blue color scheme. The floors are gleaming hardwood, and through the door on the right side past the walk in closet lies a bathroom with white marble countertops and a glass shower. She’s seen this all before, and every time it irks her to think about how wasteful the extravagance is.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You coulda warned me it was gonna be that bad,” JJ deadpans from his spot on the singular king size bed. It doesn’t surprise Kie whatsoever. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I literally told you it was gonna be like my mom on ten,” she grumbles, taking off her shoes and climbing on top of it beside him. Her annoyance fades as she lays down, facing him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well </span>
  <em>
    <span>yeah, </span>
  </em>
  <span>but this is a fucking mansion, Kiara! Half the people here spend more on their dogs in a week than I make in a year.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And the other half make less in a year than you do too.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>His face softens up as he takes her reminder, and she sighs.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I know it’s shitty, and that all the fancy shit can’t make up for the judging and the snide remarks about to come at us, but it won’t be like that all the time, at least.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It’s the best she can offer him. He’s doing her possibly the biggest favor of her life and she can’t think of any more ways to let him know how grateful she is. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m just saying, the minute one of your aunts tries to make a move on me or one of your cousins starts talking about caviar, I’m out.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kie pushes on his shoulder and he sits up. The trademark mischievous gleam runs through his eyes, and all she has time for is a, “JJ, </span>
  <em>
    <span>don’t</span>
  </em>
  <span>” before he’s grabbing her waist and pulling her down. They roll and she grabs a pillow, hitting his chest with it. They roll back and he takes his own, returning her attack with one to the shoulder. Thus a pillow fight ensues, both of them howling and laughing like kids, chasing each other around the bed and throwing a few other pillows at each other as well. They explode after they come into contact with each other, feathers spilling out and flying everywhere. They engulf the pair, shrouding them in soft white clouds. There is one untouched pillow left within reach after they finish chucking handfuls of feathers at each other (which is a lot harder than cheesy teen movies make it seem). </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kiara’s eyes meet JJ’s and in the next instant, she’s going for it. She dives, capturing the pillow in her arms at the same time he leaps for it. He wrestles it from her, tossing it behind them with one hand as he takes her wrists and pins them up by the headboard with the other. She struggles against him for a moment, glaring, but JJ’s always had a tight grip so she lets it go, stilling her movements. JJ’s body is pressed up against hers, firmer than she remembers. His pupils are slightly larger than normal, and with every breath she takes, her chest brushes his. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Around here, it’s rude to stare.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She curses the slight breathlessness in her tone.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Pretty sure I’m the rudest person you know, Kie,” he returns, and she swallows.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re pretty improper from the looks of it.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lily’s voice sounds off from the door and she cheerfully enters as Kiara scrambles out from underneath JJ. They sit on opposite sides of the bed, looking like two scolded children caught sneaking candy. Lily continues on casually, sweeping by the mounds of feathers without faltering.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That’s good. Your grandfather would turn over in his grave if you ever married a stiff, rich or poor. And don’t look so shocked, honey. I knocked three times, but it appears you two were otherwise occupied.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Heat builds in Kie’s cheeks and she swears right there that the next time she blushes, she’s going to do something reckless. This isn’t </span>
  <em>
    <span>her </span>
  </em>
  <span>— she’s not the type to flush because of a comment or two. And yet, here she is, back to acting a stupid sixteen year old with a crush. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Grandma Lily, this is JJ,” Kiara manages through her absolute mortification, “JJ, this is my grandmother from my dad’s side.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>To his credit, he seems more at ease as he stands up to go greet her with, “It’s nice to meet you, ma’am.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, hush, none of that now. You’re family. It’s Lily.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She pulls him into a hug, and Kiara bites down on the laugh that threatens to come careening out of her throat. JJ’s not much of a hugger, but from her dad’s side of the family, he’s gonna have to get used to it. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Especially </span>
  </em>
  <span>with her grandmother. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lily lets him go, explaining, “Well, I just wanted to come up here and meet you before all the hullabaloo tonight.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>JJ’s question glance occurs at the same time Kiara mutters, “Shit, I forgot. Everybody will be downstairs and gathered for our first night here. It’s a time to play catch up and schmooze, to show off, basically. It’s just dinner and drinks, though.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ll leave you to give your fiancé the rest of the itinerary, Kiara,” Lily smirks, heading towards the door.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It was nice to meet you, JJ,” she adds, an indecipherable sparkle shining in her eye as she turns and heads out the door. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>JJ whistles, falling back down onto the bed after the door shuts. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Damn, Kie. Your family is the </span>
  <em>
    <span>definition </span>
  </em>
  <span>of Full Kook.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Practically wrote the rulebook,” Kiara rolls her eyes as she sits back against the headboard. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You gonna give me the rundown or do I have to beat your ass in a pillow fight again?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>JJ’s shit eating grin draws a scoff from her, and she retorts immediately. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You only won cause you </span>
  <em>
    <span>cheated </span>
  </em>
  <span>and pinned me.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Don’t act like you didn’t like it, though.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Will you shut up and let me explain the next few days or do you wanna keep running your mouth?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>His grin widens as he sits up and she huffs, calming herself before launching into an explanation of their weekend. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Tonight, Thursday night, consists of a family dinner and drinks. Friday night, Christmas Eve, they spend preparing dishes and getting ready for the night. It’s games, music, with some decent prizes for winning. A few gifts may be exchanged, but it’s a lot less formal in nature than before. Christmas Day begins with opening presents, but after that they’re free to head out to the slopes and go skiing or snowboarding, maybe a sleigh ride, ice fishing — whatever strikes them. They leave Sunday morning and head back to the OBX.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>JJ absorbs the information, and Kie leaves him to sit on it for a while. She goes to the spacious attached bathroom and begins de-feathering herself, focusing on mentally preparing herself for the days to come. They’ve been doing pretty good thus far, but there’s still a long way to go before they’re officially in the clear. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kie comes out of her head and back into the room to find JJ knocked out. Chuckling underneath her breath at the snoring male, she makes her way to the door and quietly closes it behind her as she exits their room. As she walks down the hall, she can’t help but be relieved. In the midst of all this chaos, it’s nice to know some things will never change.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>***</span>
</p><p>
  <span>JJ wakes up to find Kiara gone, but that’s not a problem. It’s happened plenty of times at The Chateau before. Even when they were younger, he got used to her running out so she could sneak back over to her parents house before they woke up. As they grew up, it shifted to her going to catch the Ferry back to the mainland so she could go back to school. Kiara’s absence is something he’s grown accustomed to, but her returns are as well. And she’s right on time, heading in through the door with a garment bag and a look that says she’s contemplating murder.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Before we kill anyone, you gotta give me some context. You know these things, Carrera,” JJ tuts, clicking his tongue and wagging a finger at her as if to shame her. It’s on instinct, the teasing, and she matches it. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>We </span>
  </em>
  <span>are not killing anyone, Maybank. And before you start, </span>
  <em>
    <span>you </span>
  </em>
  <span>are not killing anyone either. There will be no murder.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>JJ pouts, grumbling underneath his breath, and the ghost of a laugh escapes Kiara’s lips. Mission accomplished there, at least. The larger mission’s endgame is yet to be revealed, but from where he’s standing, they’re on track to becoming world renowned movie stars with their talent.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“But seriously, what’s in the bag?” He stands up to meet her and she tosses it down on the bed, shaking her head at it. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“A dress. A </span>
  <em>
    <span>fucking dress. </span>
  </em>
  <span>It’s supposed to be an early Christmas present from one of my cousins, but the amount it costs could cover gifts and supplies for at least five families right now.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She’s disgusted and so is JJ. While Kiara’s definitely the more social justice aware of the two of them, it’s never sat right that people on The Cut are in a constant state of flux and struggle while those who live on Figure Eight are only concerned with which golf course they’re going to that day. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You could burn it. Chuck it in a fireplace. Or sell it and use the money for some charity or something.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>JJ’s suggestions are met with Kiara’s head shaking again, and her voice is controlled yet enraged as she spits out, “Can’t. My mom </span>
  <em>
    <span>and </span>
  </em>
  <span>my grandmother will give me absolute hell if I don’t wear it tonight, and that is gonna spread through the family like wildfire so I might as well just suck it up and see if I can convince her to donate later.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It looks like that’s as good a plan as it’s going to get, so JJ keeps his mouth shut. He gives her a pat on the shoulder for support and she manages to toss him a half smile. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They start getting ready for the night an hour later, after ridiculing a random episode of a show about how love yet again saves Christmas featuring a so called ‘raven haired princess’ and a red headed ‘football god’ and doing their best to clean up all the feathers. They both end up with one stuck in their hair at almost all times, but they manage to remove them once the brunt of the work is done. As for the dinner preparations involving clothing, JJ didn’t really have a suit to pack (just one part of the endless perks of living on The Cut and working for a semi decent wage). Fortunately, a couple of Kiara’s family members managed to rustle up some clothes for him to wear throughout the weekend. He didn’t ask when he was handed the bag, only gave a thank you before proceeding to roll his eyes into the sky at the amount of fabric he was staring at. He’s never been one to dress up, but for the sake of making this look real, he figures he’s gotta play the part to perfection. Even if that includes being a fucking Ken doll every single day.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Fucking Kooks.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>The suit is a little tight on him, but he fills it out well. He’s pretty sure it’s a typical style, </span>
  <em>
    <span>nothing too special for the kid from The Cut</span>
  </em>
  <span>, his mind snarks. But of </span>
  <em>
    <span>fucking </span>
  </em>
  <span>course they had to give him a bow tie. JJ’s track record with bow ties is slim to none, as in he’s never actually tied one correctly. At this point, he’s ready to put his foot down and say fuck it, this is the line in the sand, a goddamn bow tie, but the bathroom door opens and he loses every single thought he’s ever had. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kiara’s dress is green, an emerald color. It’s got straps and a </span>
  <em>
    <span>very </span>
  </em>
  <span>low neck, and if that wasn’t enough, he catches a glimpse at the back as she brushes past him, muttering curses underneath her breath. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>There’s a hole cut into it so he can see her soft brown skin curve and dip, and he’s pretty sure someone should just kill him now because </span>
  <em>
    <span>holy fuck</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Kiara Carrera has an </span>
  <em>
    <span>ass. </span>
  </em>
  <span>More than when they were sixteen and barely fitting underneath the tight fabric of her dress. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Fuck. Stop being a fucking creep, this is </span>
  </em>
  <span>Kie. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Your best friend. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“What?” Kiara asks, and he realizes he’s been staring at her wordlessly as she comes up and begins to tie his bow tie.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Nothing,” JJ shrugs, and she raises an eyebrow.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Seriously? No smirking comment? No flirty remark?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“If you want me to tell you how fucking hot you look, just ask, babe.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He catches her biting down on her lips and grins, victorious. Her hands finish the bow tie and they stay on it for a beat. Her eyes flicker up to his, and he almost wonders if she’s going to tell him off for his silence again. But she doesn’t. Kiara steps back, clearing her throat. Still, JJ curves an arm around her waist.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What are you —” she begins, but he cuts her off, “Would you just trust me for once?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I trust you,” Kiara grumbles, and JJ rolls his eyes. The back of her dress is tied right as the cut open part ends, but it’s come undone. Quickly, JJ’s fingers twist and turn, tying off the back so it’s secure. He presses it down, and he swears he can hear Kiara gasp quietly as his fingers ghost against her skin. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We’d better get going,” she says, stepping away from him and moving towards the door. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah,” JJ coughs, extending his arm. She takes it, and they’re off to dinner. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Walking into the huge dining room feels one part awe inspiring, one part eat the rich anger inducing, and one part chum for the sharks. It’s filled with Kiara’s family, both sides. There are designer labels everywhere, flukes of champagne glistening underneath crystal chandeliers. Red and green are common themes for colors, gold and white also appearing. At first, it’s nearly sensory overload, all the noise and colors and people. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey,” Kiara murmurs, turning and placing her hands on his face gently, “I’m right here.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I know,” JJ responds, his own hands coming up to brush at the bare skin of her wrists. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Goodness, you two are adorable,” one of Kiara’s cousins, Janelle, beams, and Kie laughs, linking her arm with his once more. Just like that, they’re back to playing a part. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I knew that dress was the right choice!” she winks, before fluttering off to go charm someone else.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kiara growls, stepping forward but JJ pulls her back.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey. No murder, remember?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kie huffs, begrudgingly giving him a nod, and he laughs, pressing her closer into his side. They continue inside the dining room and speak with her family, and right when JJ’s ready to take out one of his eyes with a melon baller as opposed to going through another superficial conversation, they’re being told to take their seats. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>All three of Kiara’s grandparents head one of the massive tables, and Kiara and JJ sit a few places down, near her parents. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Opening remarks are given, laughs and memories shared, and it occurs to JJ that maybe even the elite can remove the silver spoons from their asses just long enough to care about something other than superficial shit. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m sure you’re all wondering who that handsome young man sitting by Kiara’s side is,” Lily begins warmly, and JJ feels a hundred eyes boring into him as a result. “Kiara, would you like to introduce him?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Or better yet, do the first toast of the evening?” Clarisse adds. Kie’s shoulders scrunch up infinitesimally, but JJ takes her wrist under the table, rubbing soothing circles into it. He watches as she steels herself and stands, surveying the eyes locked onto them both.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Everyone, this is JJ. My fiancé.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Whispers erupt, but they quickly turn to cheers and congratulatory shouts. JJ grins up at her. Kie takes a glass, lifts it, and says, “Since I’m doing the toast tonight, I’ll keep it short and sweet. I just want to make a toast to family. No matter how mad or messy it all gets, they’re always there for you. So yeah, here’s to family. And to the rest of my life with the man who’s had my back through everything.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He doesn’t know what unearthly force possesses him, but JJ takes the hand her ring is on and lifts it to his lips. His eyes never leave hers. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Love you, </span>
  </em>
  <span>Kie mouths, almost like a silent blurt, and he reminds himself that they were lucky to have gotten this far without having to say those words. </span>
  <em>
    <span>It’s all for the show,</span>
  </em>
  <span> he reminds himself, </span>
  <em>
    <span>so suck it up. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Love you too, </span>
  </em>
  <span>he mouths back, and she smiles at him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“To family,” Kiara repeats, and the words echo throughout the room as all the guests take a drink. JJ downs his glass, not giving a fuck about propriety at the moment. He’s gonna need some more alcohol if the whole ‘pretending to be madly in love with his best friend’ thing is gonna work since they’re upping the ante now. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dinner starts and JJ tucks into his meal, Kiara subtly guiding him with quick whispers and spoon switches. They’re back to going through questions about their relationship, the proposal, all of it. However, through some sort of subconscious agreement, they dance around questions about the future. It’s, “Let’s just get to the wedding first,” rather than, “We’re thinking about kids someday.” They ignore the pointedly skeptical looks, the under the table remarks about how their marriage won’t last.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Joke’s on them, </span>
  </em>
  <span>JJ thinks, </span>
  <em>
    <span>this engagement is only on for two more days. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>It’s an eternity before they’re allowed to escape. Whispers of the pair not being able to keep their hands off of each other follow them out of the dining room and up the stairs. He supposes that’s true enough; his hand has been dangerously low on Kie’s waist all night, and she’s either had her fingers intertwined with his or one of her arms, or her arm around his middle. He can’t remember them being so blatantly touchy before, but it isn’t uncomfortable. In fact, it feels as natural as bumping her off a surfboard or nudging her with his elbow. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Whatever concerns are approximately three seconds away from breaking through his mind from that particular thought dissolve when his name is called by one of Kie’s cousins.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Babe?” Kiara questions, but she frowns as she sees the reason for their interruption.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ll see you upstairs,” JJ murmurs, kissing her cheek. She nods and detaches, and he goes over to speak with the young man staring him down. He recognizes him as Janelle’s husband, Tanner. Also as a Grade A Douchebag, but there seems to be plenty of that going around. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I know what you’re doing,” Tanner says, and JJ reverts back to the oldest trick in the book: </span>
  <em>
    <span>deny, deny, deny. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t know what you’re talkin’ about, man.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Do you think I’m stupid? I know you’re only marrying Kiara because of our family’s money.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>JJ can’t hold in a laugh anymore, because that’s the stupidest shit he’s ever heard. Yes, Kie’s loaded, more stacked than a Mack truck, but she barely acknowledges her wealth. And when she does, it’s to call out the privilege surrounding it or to use it in a positive way. So yeah, this guy’s a fucking idiot for even </span>
  <em>
    <span>thinking </span>
  </em>
  <span>that JJ would use Kiara for cash. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“All due respect,” JJ says, (which, by the way, is absolutely none), “I’ve known Kie since we were kids. She’s been there for me through shit you can’t even imagine, and she’s my best friend on God’s green fucking Earth. I love her.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And he does. JJ loves Kiara. But not in the way that he’d </span>
  <em>
    <span>really </span>
  </em>
  <span>want to put a ring on her finger and belong to her forever. Just in the way that he would </span>
  <em>
    <span>pretend </span>
  </em>
  <span>to, because she asked him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re not good enough for her. You’ll never be good enough for her. And when she leaves you for a better man who can support her lifestyle and give her everything she wants, you’re gonna realize that she only hung out with street trash to scratch some rebellious itch.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It takes everything inside of JJ not to take his fist and cave Tanner’s face in. Instead, amazingly, he does something he never chooses to. He walks away from a fight. He tunes out the words Tanner spits at him and goes up to the room. Of course, slamming the door with a little more force garners Kiara’s attention. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She looks like her usual self again, face devoid of makeup in a t-shirt and shorts. Her hair is tossed up into a messy bun at the top of her head, and JJ’s mind tells him that no matter how many diamonds she wears, this Kiara will always be his favorite. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Come here,” is all she says, so he strips off his jacket and enters her arms. She holds his head against her chest and he focuses on her heartbeat, counting the steady rhythm as it pounds out. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You rocked it tonight, J,” Kie murmurs, flattening her cheek against his hair.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Was nothin’,” JJ mumbles back, his voice muffled because of his head placement. Kie’s lips ghost the top of his hair and he sighs into her, tightening the grip around her waist. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They stay like that for some time, breathing and thinking, wrapped up in each other. Eventually he gets up and changes into a t-shirt and shorts as well, and they climb underneath the covers together. JJ places his head against Kie’s shoulders as she leans back against his chest. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Two more days,” she whispers.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Two more days,” he repeats. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Way too much and not nearly enough. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>JJ closes his eyes, breathing in the earthy scent that follows Kiara everywhere. He’s going to need his rest if they’re going to keep making this work tomorrow. The part of him that's dreading waking up clutches Kie tighter, and she grips onto his arms in response. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Two more days. A second and a lifetime.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>JJ figures he’s fucked either way, but that’s nothing new. He can already tell how this is going to go. They’ll make it through, maybe with a few more stilted interactions but nothing they can’t handle. Their performance will convince Kiara’s family enough to get off her back once she announces their amicable split, and she and JJ will go back to their normal lives. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He should be happy to get out of this prada infested snake pit, but not all of Kie’s family are vipers. He’s had a few good, honest conversations with them. And maybe it doesn’t suck that they already treat him like family. He’s going to lose that when this is all over. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Did you ever really have it, though?</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>JJ burrows down deeper again to Kiara. It doesn’t matter if he loses the potential of more family as long as he has her at the end of it. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Go to sleep, babe,” Kiara mumbles drowsily and his eyebrows raise a little.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Go to sleep, JJ,” Kiara repeats and it occurs to him that he might be losing it. He shrugs against her, shifting again. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Trying to, Kie. Sorry.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Shh. Just close your eyes. Breathe. Be here with me.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She holds him closer, hands running over his back lightly and messing with his hair. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He’s out like a light in two minutes. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>*** </span>
</p><p>
  <span>When Kiara wakes up, she’s still tangled up in JJ. If she didn’t know any better, she’d think they were sixteen again, on the pullout at The Chateau, holding each other close to keep the monsters at bay. It works then like it works now — they’re both resting easily. Kie’s lips quirk into a smile as she watches him sleep. He looks younger, less like the hardened young man carrying a lifetime of pain and neglect and more like the reckless goofball she sees come out around her when they’re fishing on The Pogue or pranking each other on the island. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Her fingers come up on their own accord, brushing back strands of blonde. They trace his eyebrow, the curve of his cheek, his jawline. She wonders why this doesn’t feel as weird as it should. Nobody’s watching them, there’s no performance to go by, and here she is, touching him like he belongs to her. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Practicing, </span>
  </em>
  <span>she snaps harshly at herself, </span>
  <em>
    <span>you’re practicing. For later. In front of everyone. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Kiara slips out from underneath him carefully, choosing to overlook the soft, “Mm,” of protest that leaves his lips. She showers fast, tossing on a festive tank top that reads, ‘Merry Christmas Ya Filthy Animal’ and black leggings, before sneaking downstairs to the kitchen. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It’s early enough to be deserted, which is what she was counting on. She begins rifling through the cabinets for a snack, humming absently underneath her breath.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Where’s your young man?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It’s her Grandma Lily, sitting secluded in one of the dark corners, enjoying a meal. After Kiara’s soul comes back to her body, she registers the question. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>He’s not my young man! </span>
  </em>
  <span>Kiara wants to scream, </span>
  <em>
    <span>he’s my best fucking friend. That’s it. That's all. Nothing more and it can’t be. Not ever. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Sleeping,” she smiles, lips closed. Lily hums, not looking up from the leftovers on her plate. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m not blind, Kiara.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kie resumes her search, trying the lower cabinets to see if they hold anything for her. Her hands land on a box of cookies and she pulls it out, inspecting it as she queries her grandmother. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What do you mean, Grandma Lily?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s okay that you love him, baby. He loves you too.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Of course we love each other — we’re engaged.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kie checks herself when her grandmother raises an eyebrow, realizing she snapped off a little with her words. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m just saying it would be pretty bad if we were engaged and we didn’t love each other,” she finishes, shoving a few cookies into her mouth.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Or if you love each other but aren’t engaged,” Lily mumbles under her breath, stirring the tea in her teacup with her spoon. Kie coughs, shaking her head and spluttering, “What?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She couldn’t have possibly heard that right.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I didn’t say a thing, honey,” Lily responds innocuously, and Kiara decides to take her cookies to go. She ends up dozing off in a comfortable armchair in the library, box hanging haphazardly over the edge, halfway in her arms. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>When she awakens a few hours later, she returns to their room after stopping by the kitchen and putting the cookies away. Lily must’ve gone back to bed as well, but Kie’s not entirely certain her sleep hazed mind didn’t concoct that interaction.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>As she nears the door, the strains of guitar strings pour out. Kie tiptoes closer, pressing her ear against it as she tries to catch the sound. Her mouth falls open when she realizes JJ’s </span>
  <em>
    <span>singing</span>
  </em>
  <span>. JJ doesn’t sing. She’s known about the guitar for years; he picked it up around the eighth grade and it worked like a charm getting girls. If he ever sang, it was loud and off key, comedic shit. This is quiet and in tune and </span>
  <em>
    <span>holy shit he can sing. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“I’m losing myself in you, in you, in you, in you, in you, I know.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>She listens for a few more seconds, but a shift in her weight causes her to stumble forward through the door.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Uh,” she starts.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“This is an invasion of my privacy, Carrera,” JJ deadpans and Kie rolls her eyes.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Dude, I’m your fiancée. I should know that you can sing.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Fake </span>
  </em>
  <span>fiancée,” JJ corrects and the pang her heart makes is promptly passed over, “and surprise. I’m musical.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Finish the song?” Kiara requests, coming over to sit on the floor in front of him. He’s a little above her on a cozy looking ottoman, and he combats, “Only if you sing for me too. Don’t think I missed you packing your uke.”</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Damn it. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Fine,” she concedes, and he continues the song. It’s a lot less rock and roll than she expected, but then again, JJ could make any genre work because he himself is unexpected.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>So sappy this morning. What the hell is wrong with you? </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>He sings like he’s performing, flirting with her through song lyrics. Her responses are dancing, of course, a few suggestive smirks and laughs here and there. It’s lighthearted and so totally </span>
  <em>
    <span>them. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>She loves it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>When he’s done, she playfully claps as he hops up and bows. Then Kiara’s grabbing her ukulele and taking his place. She sits criss crossed on the ottoman and strikes up the opening chords to the song.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“I like my girls just like I like my honey; sweet, a little selfish.” </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>JJ tosses her a rakish grin and she winks as she continues. Kie works with the tempo, keeping it slower with a chiller vibe than the original. Every time she looks up, JJ’s rocking out, tossing his hair and shaking, beaming at her. She tips her chin, beckoning him forward as she sings. He obliges, sliding up, careful not to touch her (she assumes to keep the music going). Their private concert winds down to an end as Kie riffs. JJ’s eyes are impressed, but there’s a hint of infatuation in the little flecks of darker blue she swears is because of the spell of the music. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Shit, Kie,” he exhales, and she finds herself shifting an inch closer to him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That good?” She whispers back, and he nods immediately, leaning up to meet her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re fucking incredible.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>His palms are warm against her thighs, curving down on her perfectly. Her ukulele provides some space between them, but her lips end up centimeters away from touching his regardless. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“J —”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A child bounds into their room, door thrown wide open and Kie moves back, exhaling. She’s never been more grateful yet simultaneously annoyed at an intrusion in her life.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Gotta start locking that,” JJ mumbles as he moves away from her. She shoots him a weighted glance before turning her attention to their unexpected guest. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Kiara! Are you and your fiancé gonna sing tonight?” The owner of the voice is an adorable dark skinned girl with bright eyes. One of her cousin’s kids on her dad’s side — Julia. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t know, Jules,” Kie hums mischievously, shrugging overly offhandedly, “Only if JJ’s up to it.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Please be up to it!” The little girl begs, running over to JJ with her hands clasped. Kiara smirks and tilts her head at him, and he glares at her before shrugging. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Sure, Jules. We’ll sing for you guys tonight.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yay! Thanks Uncle JJ!” Julia yells, throwing her arms around the blonde man’s legs. He laughs and hugs her back, picking her up and spinning her around before setting her down. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What?” he asks when he finds Kiara’s gaze on him, fond smile lighting up her lips.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She shakes her head, “Nothing. We’d better go downstairs, though. I think all the music distracted Julia from coming to tell us to help out.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>JJ hums sagely, “I’m a pretty big distraction.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, you are,” Kiara agrees, before tugging on his arm and beginning their journey to the kitchen. While the space is quite large, it’s an entirely different vibe from the previous night. Both sides of her family are cooking up a storm, trading jokes and recipes, taste testing and panicking a bit over ingredients. All the countertops are full and fridges open and close, pantry doors following suit as their raiders emerge with whatever is needed for their various dishes. Children weave in and out of the area, shooed away by mothers and fathers, aunts and uncles, and the grandmothers. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So glad you too could finally join us,” Lily beams with a knowing glance, and Kie stiffens. She gazes straight ahead, feeling JJ shrug as he mumbles, “Better late than never, right?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Better on time,” Clarisse snarks, though she backs off with a look from Lily. “Kiara, you go help with the roast. JJ here can frost the cookies.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, good luck with that one, babe,” Kiara calls, laughing over her shoulders as she walks to her place, “They’re gonna eat you alive.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Think you beat them to it earlier, babe,” JJ returns, and it’s Kie’s turn to have her eyes go wide as saucers.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“JJ! There are </span>
  <em>
    <span>kids here</span>
  </em>
  <span>.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What? It’s not like they’re gonna know.”</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>And not like we actually did that, either. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Will you two lovebirds quit yammering and get to work? We’ve got a lot to do.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Once again, Lily brings them back into focus. Kiara gets to working, ignoring the pointed sparkle in her grandmother’s eye. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It takes about an hour, but she’s almost done with the seasoning and brining when she feels arms slip around her waist. She relaxes into them as lips meet her ear, murmuring, “That is gonna taste amazing, I can already tell.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Better than me?” Kiara pouts, and the shock blooming in his irises is worth everything she pushed down to get the words out. Naturally, he’s smirking in the next second, firing back, “Kiara, there are </span>
  <em>
    <span>kids here — </span>
  </em>
  <span>”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Shut up,” Kie tells him, and she places her lips against his. The move surprises her; it’s completely spontaneous. JJ responds immediately, tugging her closer and gripping her hips. Kiara drops the basting brush she was using to curl her hands into his hair instead. It’s got him biting at her lip gently, so she figures the decision was the right call to make. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Catcalls and whistles bring her back to reality, and she breaks the kiss, remembering where they are. JJ stays close, but there are a million questions swimming underneath the lust in his eyes. Kiara can’t answer any of them, so she doesn’t. She does, however, grab him by his shirt and haul him back in for another kiss before releasing him with a pat to the shoulder. JJ, grinning madly, returns to his cookie frosting.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That’s my future wife,” he announces proudly to one of her cousins, and Kiara can’t hide the wide smile that paints her lips. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Soon enough, the food is left to set and finish up, which leaves Kiara and JJ with just enough time to get ready for the night’s festivities. Rather than speak to him and risk questions she has no explanations for, she goes straight into the bathroom and locks the door. Being alone with her thoughts isn’t the brightest idea, but it’s better than facing the fact that she just </span>
  <em>
    <span>kissed him in front of her entire family sober for no good reason. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Not technically no good reason. That’s something a future wife would do. It’s all part of the act, and we’re being really convincing. Nobody in my family suspects a thing. And JJ’s cool with it — he kissed you back! Because he’s JJ and likes kissing. So just… calm the fuck down, Kie. Stop making this bigger than it is. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Kiara isn’t prone to panicking. She can keep a clear head, snark her way through fear. Her shoulders drop as she gets underneath the shower water, allowing the spray to beat away any lingering emotions as she washes herself off. She takes her time, even going through her entire hair care routine with skin care for extra measure. She and JJ switch places as she gets her makeup on, and she’s getting into her outfit for the night. A formal, wine red romper with a v neck cut down to the high waistline and full length sleeves. Her heels are thicker than last night’s razor thin stilettos, and there are silk bows wrapped around the front at a few inches above her ankles. Of course there’s pockets for her phone, and anything else she may need throughout the course of the night. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The door opens and she finds JJ in a deep blue button down, sleeves rolled up to the elbows. His hair is still a little wet from the shower, curling in slightly at the edges. It’s a little mussed, but a far cry from his usual ‘it’s drying and goes where it wants’ look. His pants are black and dressy and his fingers are in his pockets. He’s rocking back and forth on his heels, and all Kiara can think is that he still looks so fucking good in </span>
  <em>
    <span>converse </span>
  </em>
  <span>and his dressy ass outfit. Well, that, and how proud she is of him for making a genuine effort every time they go do something. She shushes her mind then, shifting her attention to a manageable problem. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Braid me up?” she asks him, and she sees the relief in his eyes as he responds, “Yeah. I got you.” Kie keeps her hands to herself as she enters the bathroom, and she holds her breath when he comes up to stand behind her. JJ’s hands run through Kiara’s hair gently as he takes a few strands and twists them, weaving a braid as she requested. He repeats the action and she finds herself closing her eyes, back meeting his chest unconsciously. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Kie.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>His voice is low in her ear and she’s nearly hypnotized. She decides she’d much rather go to bed now than downstairs, fall asleep on his chest and forget any complications. There’s amusement in JJ’s voice as he continues, “You gotta stand up a little bit more or else this won’t work.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Her eyes fly open and she nods sharply, straightening herself out and clearing her throat. She’s silent for the rest of the time he works. When he’s done, she’s got a few strands of hair down in the front, framing her face and the decorative braids wrap around, feeding into a little bun in the back. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You remembered,” Kiara whispers, grinning giddily and touching the hairstyle cautiously. She taught him a couple of fancier tricks before the Pogues all went to prom together as friends. She flat out refused to spend money on a hairdresser when she could give it to her friend whose income was as unsteady as the tide. Clearly, that was money well spent. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hell yeah I remembered, dude. Shit took me, like, two weeks to learn.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Her grin widens as JJ’s eyes roll, and she links her arm through his. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Kiara,” he says, stopping her before she can walk any further, “Not that I’m complaining or anything like that, fuck no, but that kiss… ”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Was just part of the act,” she finishes for him (albeit a little too quickly), “like yours when you kissed my hand last night. Like when I told you I love you. Like everything.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Something shifts in his expression, almost imperceptible, but she knows him. Kiara knows JJ. And yet, she has no idea what the hell is going on in his mind right now. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Just making sure,” JJ says a few moments later, and she nods weakly. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Let’s go, then.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kiara wants to stop, to ask him what shifted within those six sentences because </span>
  <em>
    <span>something </span>
  </em>
  <span>did and she’s not sure what. But they’ve got a job to do, and that is her number one focus. She can worry about JJ’s head when the night’s over.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>In this moment, she fixes her face, painting on a pretty smile and mentally dousing her insides with non capitalist related holiday cheer. The creed every great performer bolsters her, and when she walks, it’s with absolute confidence. Those five words ricochet across her brain, over and over and over again.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>The show must go on.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>***</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The thing JJ never expected before this weekend was that Kiara’s family would know how to party. Based on the bass blasting from the extravagant living room, the shouts of joy and chortles from soon to be drunk adults and shrieks from children, this is the loosest he’s ever going to see them. Which, of course, is fucking fantastic because this, </span>
  <em>
    <span>this </span>
  </em>
  <span>is JJ’s element. He’s always at his best when he’s turning up, so tonight should be about having the time of his life — a Boneyard bash remix. If only Kie’s words would get out of his head. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He has no idea what’s going on, and it’s freaking him out a little. First of all, this is </span>
  <em>
    <span>Kiara Carrera. </span>
  </em>
  <span>His best friend since childhood. They’ve seen each other through their awkward stages, into high school and beyond. A couple of days with her family shouldn’t change that. But JJ knows her, and he knows kisses. He’s had plenty of experience with both (albeit never at the same time until recently). That kiss in the kitchen felt like more than just performance. But he has to believe her when she says it means nothing — because it can’t mean anything. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>JJ can’t even consider fucking up his friendship because of some horniness and a few blurred lines. There hasn’t been anything clear between them since they were sixteen, now that he comes to think of it. Their game of question and rejection ran with them as they grew up. They’re standing on the edge of grown, but they act like the teenagers they’ve always been. It’s something JJ’s always appreciated, that he doesn’t have to grow up when he’s with Kie because he knows he’s damn well had to do it with everyone else. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Sighing, JJ takes another swig of his drink. His brain is doing too much thinking.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I would kill someone for a few grams right now,” he mumbles into Kiara’s ear, taking her out of the schmoozing she so desperately wants to avoid for the rest of the night. It’s been an hour and some of her family insist on being insufferable pricks rather than letting it all go like the rest of them. He understands Kie’s thoughts well enough; no more stuffy Kook shit when everyone’s finally having fun. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kie exhales, a quick shake of her head sufficing as her assent. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>I knew I should’ve brought the weed.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>But </span>
  <em>
    <span>no, </span>
  </em>
  <span>making a good impression was far too important because of a fake engagement. The entire thing is so twisted up and double edged. Not for the first time, JJ wonders if he’s wrong for giving himself a break on </span>
  <em>
    <span>not </span>
  </em>
  <span>being confused since everything is so </span>
  <em>
    <span>goddamn confusing. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Thanks for that,” Kie tells him as they walk away, heading deeper into the celebration, “I was about to start ripping my hair out.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Figured you were due for a break,” JJ grins back at her and she pecks his cheek, eyes skyward.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Part of the act. This isn’t real. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>The music lessens with the chattering as Julia climbs up onto a chair, beaming.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I think that’s our cue,” JJ hums, “Let’s do this.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kiara’s ukulele and the guitar JJ borrowed from earlier are passed to them as the little girl introduces the pair with giggles and enthusiasm. They set themselves up on a large loveseat, Kiara crossing her legs up again like she did when she played with him, removing her heels and getting comfortable. Meanwhile, JJ reclines slightly and angles himself towards her. For a split second, it’s like they’re back at The Chateau, crammed into a hammock and jamming out. JJ focuses on that feeling, and together, they start to play.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Have yourself a merry little Christmas, let your heart be light…”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Kie’s voice, mesmerizing as ever, rings out clearly through the space. She’s like a fucking siren, enchanting everyone who listens to her sing. She’s had JJ under her spell for quite some time now. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>When it’s his turn, he does his best not to smirk at the little whispers from those watching them since </span>
  <em>
    <span>Kiara’s gorgeous fiancé can </span>
  </em>
  <span>sing</span>
  <em>
    <span> too? </span>
  </em>
  <span>He isn’t as good as she is, but it works well enough for their makeshift duet. The song itself has a melancholic feel to it, but their version is more nostalgic. He can tell what memories are running through her mind when they align with his; all the Pogue Christmases, their decorating sprees, watching festive films and lighting up to dance around the Boneyard on holidays. Snowmen made out of sand and seashells. Christmas dinner with the Heywards and the Carreras. John B and Sarah teasing Pope and his boyfriend about the medical properties of mistletoe and its effect on the human body. Kiara smacking his hand away from sneaking a treat or two before they were ready. Kiara, laughing at his frosting fails this morning. Kiara, asking him to braid her hair in that incredible red romper she’s wearing. Kiara, singing a holiday song in front of her family and smiling that small smile meant exclusively for moments like these, when her guard is all the way down and she’s lost in the music. Kiara at Christmas. This Christmas, last Christmas, every Christmas. Kiara. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“And have yourself a merry little Christmas now.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>JJ can barely keep playing as he looks at her. She’s still got that smile on, eyes lit up brighter than every single bulb in the room combined. She comes back down to Earth when her gaze finds him, and that smile widens just so. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Kie,” JJ whispers, but it’s lost in the roar of her friends and family clapping and screaming for their performance. Kiara snaps back into her role immediately, rising and shrugging. JJ goes with the flow of his role as well, hamming it up with a dramatic bow and a playful riff as he milks his time in the spotlight. Their instruments are carefully handed off and the music comes back on, cutting into the festivities once more. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They stay for an hour or two longer, going through a few games and consuming a bit more alcohol than they probably should. Not enough to get completely sloshed, but for that happy buzz that melts a good chunk of the thoughts and inhibitions away. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“JJ,” Kiara says suddenly, hand wrapping around his wrist gently, giggling softly, “Do you wanna go get high?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, thank God,” JJ grins, dispelling whatever sentimental bullshit he’d almost caught himself revealing, “Fuck yeah. I thought you’d never ask.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kiara throws a few excuses around and they return to their room. His brain makes him laugh a little with the thought that her family probably thinks of them more like magicians, the greatest duo with a disappearing act rather than cons. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The joke in his head subsides and JJ rubs his hands together excitedly, flopping down on the bed. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He unbuttons his shirt a few buttons, “I thought you said no weed. You breakin’ your own rules now, Carrera?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kiara throws him a sarcastic glance as she removes her shoes for the second time of the night, taking off her jewelry and reaching into her pockets to take everything out of them before heading over to a seemingly random drawer and producing an already rolled blunt.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Since they’re my rules, I can do whatever the hell I want. Besides, we deserve this. It’s been a long ass two days.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>JJ’s next words escape him before he can run them through his brain. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I love you so fucking much right now, dude.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kiara laughs, shaking her head as he produces lighter from his pocket and tosses it to her. She catches it fluidly, blunt already poised between her lips. Her next motion is lighting it, before she inhales and exhales a puff of smoke. A rush of blood heads south on JJ’s body as she blows and passes him the blunt, and he takes a hit, relieved.  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Fuck, Kie,” he moans, taking another hit, “I really needed this right now.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Me too,” Kiara says, but she’s looking at him strangely. It’s the same expression she gets when she’s a little too drunk, or he catches her staring for a split second when he comes up from a wave.  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Without warning, Kiara comes up to him, wrapping her legs around his waist and her arms around his neck. He leans around her, placing his head in the crook of her neck for a second and breathing her in before exhaling over her shoulder. His arms come around her waist as she steals the blunt back and hits it. Her head goes up and she exhales, and his lips connect with her neck.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Mm,” Kiara hums, leaning back to give him better access. He continues with his actions and she leans further, pulling him down on top of her. Kie gasps as one hand holds her neck, the other supporting his weight. Her breathing hitches and he smirks, lips hovering over hers. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You know what I want right now, Kie?” he whispers, tugging on her bottom lip lightly.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What?” she asks breathlessly.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>You, </span>
  </em>
  <span>his mind rebels, </span>
  <em>
    <span>I want you. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>It’s enough to freeze him in that moment, to shock him into the realization that he can’t do this with Kiara </span>
  <em>
    <span>because </span>
  </em>
  <span>he wants her and she doesn’t want him. It’s as unfair as the rest of his life but he’s used to it by now. And he’s fresh out of Christmas miracles. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Fuck,” JJ curses. He removes his hand, rolling off of her, “Nevermind. We can’t keep doing this, Kie.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Doing what?” Kiara asks cautiously, curling up her legs underneath her at the headboard while he moves towards the edge of the bed near the center. A semi mirthless laugh leaves his lips as he gestures between them, “</span>
  <em>
    <span>This, </span>
  </em>
  <span>Kiara. Whatever the hell we were about to do because nobody’s watching. We don’t have to pretend anymore.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kie’s lips open and for the briefest second, something peeks out of his chest. It shrivels up and dies when she sets her lips and nods quickly at him, shrugging, “You’re right. I forgot what we were doing there, for a second. Don’t worry, though; we’ll both be done pretending and back to our lives after tomorrow.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A frustrated groan leaves JJ’s mouth as he rakes a hand through his hair, “Dude, don’t be like that. It’s not real.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kie’s laughter is cold, scratching her throat. “Your lips on my neck felt </span>
  <em>
    <span>pretty real, </span>
  </em>
  <span>JJ.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So did your gasps, Kiara.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Are you sure I wasn’t </span>
  <em>
    <span>pretending?</span>
  </em>
  <span>” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Positive. I know when it’s real and when it isn’t.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Don’t </span>
  <em>
    <span>fucking </span>
  </em>
  <span>tell me what’s real and what isn’t JJ.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What the hell is that supposed to mean?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Nothing, dude. Like you said, </span>
  <em>
    <span>never mind.</span>
  </em>
  <span>” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>JJ’s fingers curl into fists, but he uncurls them as he breathes out. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Fine. Let’s just get through tomorrow and then everything will be perfectly fucking clear again and we can both get back to our lives.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kiara flattens her palms against the duvet she’s seated on before bunching the fabric in her hands, the hurt in her eyes painfully clear as she bites back at him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Fine.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Good.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Do you really need to have the last word, JJ?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Do </span>
  <em>
    <span>you, </span>
  </em>
  <span>Kiara?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>An exasperated grunt leaves her and he moves, roughly opening a drawer and taking his pajamas out of it. He goes into the bathroom to change, back hitting the door the moment it closes. His fists shake, and he jerks one towards the mirror on instinct. It stops just before, and he grunts, slamming it down on the counter instead. Shaking, he changes and returns to the main room. Kiara’s already on her side, back to him. He slips in wordlessly and puts his head down on the pillow. He tosses and turns as the hours lengthen, and when he blinks, the sun’s coming up. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Of course it’s fucking morning. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>He feels the bed rise as Kiara gets up, presumably to start her morning routine. She’s out the door in fifteen minutes and he takes it upon himself to finally throw the towel in on sleep and get ready. Still, he takes his frustration out on a few pillows, banging them against the bed a few times. Causing a fight would be disgraceful and he’s not gonna fuck this up for her now, no matter how strained things are at the moment. It’s funny, the very thing he wanted to avoid, fucking up their relationship, came crashing through it because of him. It’s crazy he hasn’t wrecked something else yet, fucked up royally (and this feels pretty close to fucking up to the point of no return). </span>
</p><p>
  <span>JJ drags a hand down his face and looks around. A single feather floats in front of him, the only one to have escaped the fabric of the pillows this time. He pinches it between his fingers, smoothing it out over his hands. He remembers something his mother told him a long time ago. Oddly enough, it’d been early Christmas morning, just like this one. The two of them were huddled together in his room, door locked, hoping Luke wasn’t strong enough or motivated enough to bust in. She’d been holding him tight, shielding him from his father’s drunken ranting and rampaging when she spied a feather from one of JJ’s flat, busted open pillows. She carefully retrieved it, holding it in her open palm so he could see. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“JJ,” She’d said, “Love is like a feather. It can blow away or slip through your fingertips if you try to grab it. But if you let it fall into your hands, you can hold onto it. And if it blows away again, let it go. But if it swirls around you, you try to catch it with everything you have.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He’d asked his mom if she was still trying to catch her feather and she laughed, kissing the top of his head. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“My sweet boy,” Caroline whispered, “I’ve already blown away.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>JJ sets the feather down. He wipes a few stray tears away from his eyes and gathers himself with a deep breath. He’s going to walk downstairs and deliver a performance worthy of a fucking Emmy because it’s Christmas and his friend needs him. But before that, he takes a moment to himself and his mom. Then, when he’s ready, JJ walks out the door, head up, mischievous twinkle half ruptured but still shining away in his eyes.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The feather on the bed doesn’t shift an inch. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>***</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kie presses her palms together, breathing deep. He should be here. Where is he? She knows better than to think JJ ran off; that man is the definition of ride or die. And Pogues don’t leave Pogues behind. She runs over what she said countless times, wondering if it was enough to make him go. She’s always ran hot when it comes to him, be it aimless flirting or surfing or anything, really. She supposes it came from proving herself to the boys early on, then re-proving herself after the dreaded Kook Year. It’s a juvenile tendency, but one she’s never let go of. And she never will let go of it, either. JJ Maybank and heat are a packaged deal, and she’d rather burn for the rest of her life than suffer through the cold without him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He still isn’t here. Everyone’s gathered in the living room, scattered amongst the presents underneath the tree and wherever they can fit in. Her grandmother Lily will say a few words before the gift opening commences, so he’s got a couple of minutes to appear. Her cousin Tanner shoots her a pitying look as he passes by, and Kie recites all the facts she knows about greenhouse gasses to keep from socking him then and there. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Sorry I’m late,” JJ’s voice says lowly in her ear, lips dutifully touching the side of her head as a stiff arm slides around her waist.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re good,” Kie says, but she can see that something’s on his mind and it’s fucking ridiculous that she can’t ask him because </span>
  <em>
    <span>when the hell did they start acting like they just met each other?</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Alright, everybody,” Lily calls out, clapping her hands to silence everyone. A hush falls over the crowd and a smile breaks through Kie’s stone faced expression in spite of herself. The powerhouse of a woman is truly spectacular, and she’s always proud to see the rich and mighty halted by her favorite little elderly lady. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I know we are all eager to see what Santa and our loved ones have brought us this year, but I would like to say that my favorite Christmas present of all, is Kiara and JJ.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Aws break out and heads swivel as the spotlight is placed on Lily’s granddaughter and her best friend. The elderly woman resumes speaking as JJ and Kie force smiles at each other.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ve watched that young man and my granddaughter all weekend, and it’s truly amazing, the love they have for each other. How they comfort their worries without speaking. The adoration in their eyes and their gazes. And all the passion that comes with young love, of course.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The laughter in the room buzzes through Kiara’s ears, but never once does her perfect smile slip. She is, after all, a professional. Maybe too good of one at that.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t think I’ve ever seen two people who love each other as much as they do. When she was younger, I told my granddaughter to marry the man who feels like her greatest friend. Now, it appears she’s going to do just that. Their friendship started all of this, and it will remain long after I’m gone. So, JJ, welcome to the family. Kiara, you have found one of the most genuine, caring men I’ve ever seen, and I am so excited to see your friendship grow with your relationship.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>JJ’s arm presses down against her as she lightly shakes. She’s pretty sure her lip is about to bust from how hard she’s biting down on it. If he sees the tears gathered in her eyes, he says nothing. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Now, open your gifts everyone! And Merry Christmas.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kiara takes a shuddering breath as JJ ducks his head. She sniffles as quietly as she can, wiping her eyes before putting her game face back on.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Do you wanna open yours first?” JJ asks when she faces him, and she shakes her head. “No. You go first. Merry Christmas, JJ.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Out comes a festive looking present with sharks donning christmas hats on the wrapping paper. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s just what I wanted!” JJ gasps, and Kie laughs a little, “Open it.” He rips through the paper like a kid which amuses her greatly, but he stops moving when he spots the gift. It’s a biker jacket, emblazoned with his last name on the back. Sleek, black, entirely badass with a couple shark teeth stitched underneath his name.  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He isn’t saying anything, eyes glued to the jacket, so Kie expounds on it, “I, uh, had it made custom. It’s all recycled materials, though, so obviously there’s no harm to the environment.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“This is the coolest fucking thing I have ever seen.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>His eyes lift to hers and her face clears, brightening immensely.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You like it?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I fucking love it. Bury me in this jacket, swear to God.” His face softens out when he adds in earnest, “It’s awesome, Kie. Thanks.”</span>
</p><p>“You’re welcome,” she beams and he says, “Alright. It’s your turn. I, um, didn’t have a lot of money to get it together this year; repairs at The Chateau ate my paycheck pretty quick.”</p><p>
  <span>“I’m sure I’ll love it,” Kiara reassures him with a grin and accepts the tiny green and red wrapped box. She opens her wrapping paper carefully (can’t let good paper go to waste!) and opens up the box. Inside is a small bracelet woven to look like the ocean. Tiny dolphin charms hang off of it, and her name, </span>
  <em>
    <span>Kiara</span>
  </em>
  <span>, is set in white.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh my God,” she whispers, taking the bracelet out and skimming her fingers over it gently. It’s soft to the touch while the charms are refreshingly cool. “JJ. Did you make this?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Uh, yeah,” he scratches the back of his neck, “It was surprisingly easy, actually. I just used one of the bracelet patterns you taught me and practiced it until it didn’t suck. The dolphins I made from scraps at my job, cause y’know, the environment and all that, but Sarah had to put your name in cause I had no idea how to do that pa—”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kiara crashes into him, throwing her arms around him and sending them both tumbling backwards.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Don’t go getting dramatic on me, Carrera,” JJ quips, but she’s too happy to do anything but squeeze him tighter.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I fucking love it,” she whispers fiercely. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>And you. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“What?”</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Oh, shit. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Kiara scrambles off of JJ, and he gets himself up, as wide eyed as she is. The excited screeches of kids sound off as they rush by, wacking each other with pillows. One of them bursts, and a flurry of feathers flutters out and swirls around them. A singular feather floats lazily down while the rest of them whoosh away. Kie’s head lifts up as she tracks it with her eyes, and it falls, landing directly on top of her curls. When she looks down, JJ is staring at her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Fuck it,” he mumbles. He takes her arm and hauls her to a little nook off the edge of the living room, a bay window secluded by a jutting corner. She sits when he does, angled towards him, a confused expression on her face.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“JJ…” Kie starts, but he stops her with a flick of his head.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I know you’re probably like what the hell is going on right now and trust me, I’ve asked myself this all weekend. And it’s super fucking cliche that it took me seeing a fucking feather land on your head to realize I’m in love with you, but here we are.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re… you’re in love with me?” She’s dumbfounded, barely able to get the words out. JJ looks like he’s seeing </span>
  <em>
    <span>through </span>
  </em>
  <span>her, but his hands are shaking and his ramblings are flowing steadily from his mouth so she makes sure hers is tightly closed and listens. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And I get it if you don’t feel the same way because I don’t wanna fuck up our friendship, but holy fuck, Kie. This weekend’s been insane. Being around you, touching you, kissing you all the time. I know I don’t deserve to, probably never will, but that does nothing to change how much I want you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>His words rush by and all she can do is sit there, taking them in. The pause between them lengthens as she sifts through everything he said, leaving no sentence unturned. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Finally, she says, “JJ?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>His eyes snap up from the seat to her face, “Yeah?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We’re idiots.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She cuts off his confused look by capturing his lips with her own. He kisses her back, but his eyes burn as he pulls back and says says, “Don’t fuck with me right now, Kie. I’m serious.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m not fucking with you, JJ. We’re fucking idiots. All weekend I’ve been trying to figure out why the hell it’s been so easy to pretend to be with you, but I just realized: I’m not pretending. I haven’t been pretending at all, actually. I’m in love with you too.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The cautious hope in his eyes as he murmurs, “You-You are?” is enough to make her overlook how huge she’s smiling as she places her palms on his face.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah. And it’s a big fat teenage cliche because I didn’t want to risk losing you and fucking up our friendship either, so it’s pretty good that we’re on the same page now.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Dude,” JJ smirks, “You have a crush on me. So embarrassing.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Shut up,” Kie tells him, and reconnects their lips. They return to the living room a few moments later flushed, eyes glowing. Knowing looks pass them by but Kie disregards any gaze but JJ’s.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s about damn time,” Lily whoops as she walks by, winking at the pair. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“How did she…?” JJ whispers.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I have no idea,” Kiara whispers back. A clump of white near her foot catches her eyes and a small smirk curves onto her lips as she teases, “So, feathers? What’s the connection?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>JJ shrugs, a tiny grin lighting up his face, “Something my mom told me.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kie’s expression softens and she smiles. He slides on his jacket, and helps her with her bracelet, and she wraps her arms around his neck, kissing his cheek while his arms encircle her waist.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Looking good, Carrera,” JJ grins wickedly, lips brushing against hers.</span>
</p><p><span>“That’s Carrera-Maybank to you,” she hums back, and feels him smile as he says, “Yeah? But not now though, right?”</span>   </p><p>
  <span>“Not now,” Kiara agrees, “But someday.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The next kiss he gives her is a promise. And maybe it’s all the Christmas sappiness in the air, but Kiara’s got a feeling that no matter what comes next, they’re going to be facing it together. There’s no mask for either of them, no performance or audience, no show. And Kiara thinks her grandmother was right.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>This is the best Christmas gift she’s ever gotten. <br/></span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>***</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Breaking the news a few weeks into the new year makes starting their official relationship a little bit harder for JJ, if only because he wants to be able to kiss Kiara any time instead of pretending (again) that something happened between the two of them. It takes a couple of years but they get there, amazingly. And this Christmas, the Heywards are hosting all the Pogue families. </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>JJ’s soaking in a tub, Kiara between his legs. His arms are wrapped around her, chin settled on her shoulder and she’s leaning back against him, tracing mindless patterns against his skin. He’s supposed to be washing her back, but the feeling of her hair tickling his face and how perfectly she fits in his arm is all he can think about. The holidays bring out the sap in everyone, and unfortunately (or fortunately, depending on the outlook), even JJ isn’t immune.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey, Kie?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, J?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Remember that one year when you introduced me to your family as your fake fiance and we pretended to be engaged to fool them?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“How could I forget?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well one, you still owe me a yacht,” Kiara rolls her eyes dryly and he grins before taking a deep breath and finishing, “And two, there’s something I forgot to do.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well it’s a little late for that now.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She continues her tracing, smiling to herself and he can’t help it. In his life, he’s learned that he can’t let good things slip away. And Kiara isn’t good. She’s one of the best things in his life, maybe even </span>
  <em>
    <span>the </span>
  </em>
  <span>best thing. So it’s with one hundred percent confidence that he says,  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Marry me. For real this time.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She stops, slowly turning her head to look over her shoulder at him. He trucks on, as he has the tendency to do.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I know I don’t have a ring right now and to be honest I was planning on doing this tomorrow but I—”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes,” Kie whispers, “Oh my God, JJ. Yes. Yes!” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Water flies as he pulls her in and they’re both laughing and kissing and sliding and this is one of the rare moments JJ’s learned to take a snapshot of because it’ll be something to hold onto when times get tough. He does propose for real the next night, out on The Pogue with his mother’s ring, just like they talked about. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>(“Will you do something for me?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Will you marry me?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Seriously?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Kiara Carrera. We both know sappy shit isn’t our thing but I want to spend the rest of my fucking life with you. I wanna wake up with you and go to sleep with you and listen to you yell at me on how to fix things. I wanna take you out on my bike for a real road trip. I wanna see the world with you. Everything in my life, I wanna do it with you. You are my best friend, and I’ve loved you since we were kids. And I’m literally down on my knees right now and the floor is kinda uncomfortable but I don’t even give a fuck, that’s how fucking in love with you I am. Will you marry me?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You know I will, dumbass. Yes, JJ. It’s always been yes.” )</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Clothes off, Kiara in his arms, Caroline Maybank’s ring winking up at them on her finger with the waves gently cresting around the boat, JJ’s positive nothing can get better than this. He knew it then like he knows it now; the best Christmas gift he will ever get is Kiara. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>JJ will never, ever admit it, but other than miracles, this holiday is good for the one thing that falls in line with them. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Who would’ve thought Christmas is the perfect time for </span>
  <em>
    <span>real </span>
  </em>
  <span>engagements too? </span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>The songs mentioned are Cotton Candy by YUNGBLUD and Honey by Kehlani! And, of course, Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas. The title comes from Kelly Clarkson’s song, Underneath The Tree. ❤️</p></blockquote></div></div>
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